January 24, 2012

(via email)


Dear Aunt C:
One of my best friends is always wanting to go shopping.  We have so much fun hanging out together, but I just don't want to spend as much money as she does.  I don't wanna go broke but I'm afraid if I tell her this she'll either blow me off or keep talking me in to going out.


Dear Not Broke:
Someone can actually talk you into spending money? Want my address?
This one is easy for me. If you enjoy spending time with your friend but all she wants to do is shop, grab yourself a large iced coffee before you get to the mall; and watch her shop.  No one says you have to spend money.  Suggest a nice lunch & movie at home once in a while.  It's okay, though, if you can't resist that clearance item :)


Dear Aunt C:
Usually twice a month my in-laws come for supper & of course bring the kids. We LOVE this time together. There's only one little thing. Their kids eat like pigs. They'll wipe their hands on the table cloth, set chewed food on the table, and snatch food off of my kids' plates. Now, I'll admit that my kids don't ALWAYS have the best table manners, but we're not afraid to take them out in public. I'm not sure how to address this because I don't want to offend my husband's family.  I also don't want my children picking up their bad habits!
Signed-not your waitress


Dear Waitress:
This one's easy--and fun! First, try addressing the children directly but with humor, e.g., "Whose nasty chewed up food is on the table," or "Who threw his napkin on the floor for the dog to eat?"  If this doesn't work, next time have a "neat eater" contest. Whoever the least messiest eater is gets x amount of dollars (depending on age) next least messiest also gets x amount of dollars. You can bet your bottom dollar (haha!) that next time the kids will compete.  We had ours competing in a "quiet" contest. Everybody won that time :)


Dear Aunt C:
I have a question that none of us guys can figure out, or find an answer to.  When my gf asks if she looks fat in something, what is the correct answer?
Signed: D'd if I do or don't


Dear D'd:
I'll probably have to ward off the hate mail (yeah, right--I'm hardly getting any mail! But moving along)...  My PERSONAL opinion is this:  if she doesn't want an honest answer unless it's to her liking, she shouldn't ask the question. "Do you think she's pretty?" "Do you wish my boobs were bigger?" "Do you remember where we first kissed?"  All loaded questions, as far as men are concerned. It's never your fault for being honest. Of course you think other women are pretty. Of course men like big boobs. Of course you don't remember where you first kissed (um, the car? The front porch? The adult toy store?) That doesn't mean you don't think she's not beautiful, or that she doesn't have the perfect boobs.  I guess the answer to your question is, as long as you love her and tell her so, and as long as you compliment her from time to time, the truth is the right answer to her questions. Period. And if it pisses her off, buy her some big-girl panties.